PART 24

+5 months (sorry)

SKLARS POV

We'd been arguing on and off for the past month or two. Some parts were awful, some not so bad. Yet it felt like there was nothing left worth fighting for, the connection was drowning, like our love for each other. I was forced to act like things were okay and continue the tour around Europe. Behind my makeup was a broken, scarred girl who was being torn apart by one of the only boys she'd ever loved. Of course it takes two people to cause an argument, many of which happened via phone or FaceTime (which made it worse), and it was just as much my fault as his. Part of me said to just give up and leave, though I can't deal with it. It's not like I will never see him again. He's everywhere, even when he's not. I can't walk down the street without seeing something related to One Direction. I wanted to go back to 4 months ago when everything was perfect.

Right now, it's end of November and I've just finished my world tour. I'm headed back to LA for the first time in almost 6 months. Me and Zayn are sorta talking, things are good compared to normal. Personally, I think it's due to the stress of both being in the music industry and the limits of when we can see eachother. Honestly I don't know what's going on. He'll probably end things when we next meet. I don't want that. Not at all... But it's the way things are headed.
I stepped out of the taxi and pulled my suitcase up to my house. I sighed and unlocked the door, to find piles of envelopes and what not. Always happens. Next, I got out my phone and checked my diary. Turns out I had to meet Scott for a meeting at the studio this afternoon. Then tomorrow I had decided to meet Zayn and sort this whole thing out. We were going to the cafe I took him too when we first met in LA. I wanted to sort this out, but I feared that being together may cause a scene and embarrass us. I went upstairs and got changed into something more presentable.

(Outfit)

http://www.polyvore.com/untitled_208/set?id=90889155

I got to my car and drove up to the building. It was about 30 minutes away, so by the time I got there it was 2:30. The sun was shining, and it was relatively warm for winter. I loved it when it was like this because I could already sense that Christmas was on its way yet it wasn't freezing!
I parked and buzzed in. Eventually, they let me in and I was shown to the meeting room. Inside, I saw Scott, Andrea and David.
"Hey, sorry I'm late," I said and took a seat opposite them. Andrea greeted me with a warm smile, as did the other men.
"How was your flight back?" David asked.
"Oh yanno, boring! I did get some writing done though as you asked," I said.
"Brilliant! We are hoping to start writing new songs in late January, so we can hope to release some new stuff in time for summer next year," Scott explained. I nodded, "so does that mean I have a big break?" I said excitedly.
"Yes, but of course we have the Christmas due etc..." Andrea chuckled.
"Yay! Thanks guys!" I smiled.
"Moving on... You've got bookings for the Ellen Show sometime over Christmas break, and some radio bookings but that's about it," David said.
"Okay was there anything else?" I asked.
"No you're good to go," Scott said.
"Thanks guys! Bye," I said and ran off.
I went down the corridors that I used to get lost in but immediately stopped in my tracks when I heard a familiar Irish accent ringing through a room. I followed the noise and came to a meeting room. Peering through the window I saw Niall, Harry and Zayn sitting around a table. I gasped, and I know that it's wrong to eavesdrop but I wanted to hear his voice. Even though I would hear it tomorrow but yeah.
"I'm really confused what's happening mate? You haven't spoken properly in ages, I miss cuties Sky and Zayn," Harry said.
"Harry, they keep arguing about shit and nothing is good, do you understand?" Niall cleared. Harry nodded.
" I don't even know what ever made me think we could ever have a happily ever after. It was never going to work. I guess that when I first met her she was interesting but there's only so much you can know about a person. I can't do it and neither can she. It's not like we were going to get married," Zayn said harshly.

My walls came crashing down like a huge wave. The whole relationship was a joke. He just threw it away like a piece of rubbish, and to think that I was actually going to try and work things out! I couldn't do it, he was right, I couldn't face what a complete dick he was. I could, however, try to cooperate and fix things. I hoped that he didn't mean it, but his words were sincere. Thank god he didn't know I was there.

I was done with the drama, the bullshit and the stress. Everything he said made completely sense. The truth hurts. We weren't ever going to work. It wasn't going any where. I am 100% done with Zayn Malik.

One night and thousands of tear drops later, I woke up on my sofa, cheeks stained with tears. I pulled out my phone and noticed I had 3 missed calls and 2 new messages. I slid along one of them.

Zayn- Hey Sky, we still on for coffee?
Zayn- I think there's lots of things we need to clear up...

The calls were from him as well. I didn't bother replying and simply took a shower and got dressed into black jeans and a crimson shirt. I had some toast for breakfast and went onto twitter quickly.

@skylar_Jones it just takes a moment for my worlds to come crashing down and I'm sure, from a distance you can hear them tumbling down

I slid my phone into my pocket and took a deep breath. I remembered not to wear any mascara, as it would be a waste. It would just run down my face.

I was feeling rather confident until my eyes locked with his. I froze and had to turn around. I started to walk out of the shop, then Zayn called my name.
"SKY," he said softly. You wouldn't recognise his voice from yesterday.
"Skylar... Skylar! Hey hey slow down!" We were now in the parking lot and he had caught up with me. He had moved himself so he was infront of me.
"What's wrong?" He asked, "I've been calling and texting everyone trying to get ahold of you. I didn't know if you were going to come.."
We stood there in silence, looking at each other.
"What did I do?" He asked. Uh duhh.
"It doesn't matter. It's done and I'm pretty sure that we're done too," I said, walking off.
He ran and caught up with me again.
"Whoa- what are you talking about?" He asked. He knew exactly what I was saying.
"Did you thing I was some sort of game? Did you feel sorry for me? Oh her mum died lets play with her for a bit then eventually rip her apart. Was I your charity case to make you look like a better person? Is that why you dragged this on for over a year? You figured you could toy with me until you got bored of the girl with the broken past huh? And you thought I wouldn't mind because its not the first time you've slagged me off. You thought I was used to it.
You know what really sucked about being in love with you, I was in love with you and thought we actually had something. But obviously not," I said and turned again, I was done.
"Sky," he grabbed my arm. I flinched and got out of his grasp.
"Anyway, thanks for the ride but I'm feeling pretty sick of this roller coaster now. Goodbye," I said, tears falling.
"Wait... Are we done?" He asked. I nodded and ran off to my car. I didn't think I could carry on anymore.

When I got home, I collapsed on my bed. The tears kept coming and coming, I felt like I wanted to lock myself in a box, and never come out again. I must have cried myself to sleep every night.

During the next week I still couldn't bear the fact that Zayn wasn't mine anymore. I had barely left my house and I think people could sense something was wrong. No one knew about the breaks up. I didn't tell anyone, but I don't know about him. As well as the sad ness in me, you could say I was relieved to have got rid of all of the stress and pain. But none of these feelings could contend with the amount of heartbreak I was facing. I really loved him, and all of a sudden I'd wasted a whole year on him. Whenever I try to sleep, I'm reminded of all the memories I'd shared with him. Disneyland felt like a lifetime ago, yet it was less than 4 months ago. I didn't hate Zayn. It wasn't like he did something awful to make this happen. It was a string of events that pushed us both over our limits. I'd had enough, and I'm pretty sure he had too.

@skylar_jones nothing lasts forever.

I was done with the pain. And I regret what I did. Yet I couldn't stop, it was somehow covering up the pain I experienced due to Zayn.
----------------------------------------------------


:(:(:(:(


Sorry for the wait btw I was away! x